


7x03 "False Gods" Fic Coda

by Lif61 (UltimateFandomTrash)



Series: The 100 Season 7 Codas [3]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Coda, Episode: s07e03 False Gods Coda, Gen, POV Raven Reyes, Post-Episode: s07e03 False Gods
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-02
Updated: 2020-07-02
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:15:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25036861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UltimateFandomTrash/pseuds/Lif61
Summary: Raven doesn't want to allow Jackson to tend to her after Nikki beats her.
Series: The 100 Season 7 Codas [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1763218
Kudos: 7





	7x03 "False Gods" Fic Coda

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, I'm late to the party. Just starting to try and catch up on _The 100_ now. Been wanting to watch it with my boyfriend since it's our show we connect over, but he's been so busy. And I've had migraines. Not fun. Anyway, enjoy some quality angst!

“Okay, okay. Give me some room,” Jackson ordered. Raven just tried to push him aside, even as Murphy and Emori did as he said.

“No, just forget it,” she told him, even as she panted through the pain of her beaten face.

Murphy’s voice was to her left, strict, “Raven, just let him help you.”

“I’m a doctor,” Jackson said, eyes soft and understanding, yet filled with the strong fire she’d seen in the eyes of all doctors, especially Abbey’s. It was so familiar Raven was so close to crying again. And oh god, those people. They were—

Tears spilled free, but she shook her head and tried pushing away. After the strain of the day her limp was worse, so she almost fell. Emori caught her, and righted her again. Raven pushed her off.

“Just stop it! Everybody stop!” she cried.

She could taste her own blood in her mouth, could feel it on her face. But it wasn’t enough, and it was deserved.

She’d lied, and now more people were dead. No one had ever died because of her before. And now, when they had torn society apart once again, when they were trying to fix it, she’d fallen back on what everyone else around her always did. Death, and using others.

It should’ve been her. It should’ve been her!

Murphy was right. She was the person who could always do the impossible. So why hadn’t she? Why hadn’t she!

“Raven?” Jackson asked, tentative, gloved hands drawing back from her.

Raven sobbed, and then sniffled, but tried to hold herself upright.

“I did something horrible, Jackson. And that’s the reason I’m hurt.” More tears slid free, and she could barely see the people around her, the room. “I don’t _deserve_ to be taken care of, or treated like the person I was before. I’m not! Emori, tell him!” 

Emori said nothing, and Raven turned on her. Her head was bowed, the sweat coating her skin and soaking her hair drying. Even now she was beginning to recover. Those people wouldn’t. She wanted her to explain, to vouch for the damage in her soul. Hurt, angered, she lunged for Emori, trying to _get her to understand_. Murphy grabbed her.

“Hey, hey, hey. That’s enough.” Raven struggled. “That’s enough!”

“If you’re such a goddamn hero, why don’t you tell him?” Raven asked, pleading, urging, as she broke away from Murphy. He averted her gaze. “That’s right. Just be a coward, like you always are.”

Jackson held out a gentle hand. “Raven, maybe you should sit down. I can give you something to calm your nerves.”

“I don’t need anything to calm my nerves! I killed people today! There are bodies in Ryker’s garage. Bodies that I put there! So don’t even pretend you want to take care of me — any of you. I got what I deserved. I could’ve fought back. Echo taught me plenty of moves. But I didn’t. You want to know why? ‘Cause I should be dead! I should be like one of those bodies in the garage!”

Raven broke down sobbing, hating herself, hating what she’d done, and hating what she had thought she’d had to do.

She should’ve been the one. She should’ve...

She screamed, she cried, she fought anyone who came near her. Why couldn’t they just leave her be? Let her suffer?

There was pressure, and a needle digging into her bicep, and then the world started tilting, going fuzzy. Murphy’s hand caught her head before it hit the floor. Raven’s world became black.


End file.
